~graceofgoddess

I've been thinking a lot about opening my own shop, wouldn't that be nice to spend all day in a cosy little shop full of candles and incense and pretty things? But I'm also thinking that I've seen so many shops like that open up in this town and they barely last a few months before they have to close down. I really want to say it's worth the risk but I would be kicking myself if I got into a load of debt over some silly dream. I don't know where I'm going right now, I'm thinking maybe I will have to go back to uni in order to get a proper career and get employed by some kind of illustration company thing. But again the debt worries me, education is just too expensive, I can't believe I had the chance to get a degree before they doubled the fees and I blew it. I can't believe they doubled the fees!!! :'( I was always told I'd have to have some crappy job and only be able to do art on the side, but at the time I didn't much care, I just wanted to do it anyway. Now I am seriously regretting that because I can't stand this stupid meaningless monkey job.

First entry for the journal. I'm just sorting out my old paintings now. They have been gathering dust in my room for a while. I need to sort out my room so I can start making more paintings, but I am very cramped for space. You should see the state of this office, it's a tip. I tried today to store some things safely away in the attic but was told that I couldn't store things in *their* attick. Yes I sound like a spoilt brat but I am bloody sick of living with my parents. So I said, fine, you don't want any of my stuff in *your* house. So I took all my painting off the walls and chucked 'em back in my room. Around which I can barely move. And I can scarecely get in and out of that room either for all the saw dust, planks of wood, nails, and other junk that's cluttering the hall way. I am in a desperate situation now. I need to get a full time job so I can afford to move out. That would mean selling my soul to some evil corporation and not having any time to make art. Someone please save me from my life.